There have been a lot of changes in my life lately. Leah moved out to her own apartment on January 1st. She’s enjoying her newfound freedom and likes the community she’s moved into, but she’s still close enough to visit often. She’s still not quite done collecting things she wants from this house. And we’re not quite done setting up this house either. Since she took some furniture with her, I need to find new homes for things like tablecloths and extra sheets, which are currently in clear plastic bags in my bedroom. All in all, it’s making the house feel a little less settled than any of us like.
I’m also not healing as quickly from surgery as I’d hoped. It’s been over a month since the hernia repair, and I’m still very sore and tired. I’m having pain by the surgical site, on top of insomnia and a return of depression. I’m having a rough time keeping up with the housework without hurting myself. Too often, it feels like I have a choice between eating well or getting enough rest.
I hadn’t realized just how much Leah was helping out around the house until she moved out. Hannah and Jack haven’t been quite as efficient, and that’s caused some tension. I’m trying to let go of as much housework as possible, but I can’t neglect everything. The carpets don’t need to be vacuumed every week- or even every month. It’s OK if the kitchen floor waits to be swept, or if trash doesn’t go out one night. And the kids are both old enough to wash their own clothing. But I still need to wear clean clothes and we still need to eat!
I’m not going to heal if I’m not eating enough, or if I’m eating junk. I can’t just order a pizza if I’m not feeling well enough to cook. I need to eat meat, and vegetables, and I’m going to get a whole lot sicker if any of that food is contaminated with wheat, potatoes, or corn. This pretty much means that take-out isn’t an option, no matter how bad I’m feeling. We are using paper plates and foil pans as much as possible, to minimize cleanup. But I can’t make soup in foil,and we’re still using metal utensils, and some amount of kitchen cleanup is required to be able to keep preparing food.
Both eating well and pacing myself are keys to healing. I got fibromyalgia symptoms under control by implementing the Blood Type Diet, but limiting my activities was equally important. Now that I’m healing from surgery, it’s not like the fibromyalgia magically went away. My body is dealing with both, and I need to re-learn my limits. It’s very frustrating that I can’t do all the things I want to do.